The Good Ship Catnip

When I awoke one morning, my father said to me,
"I've found you just the finest man that there could ever be!
He really wants to marry you, as soon as soon can be.
He's rich and he is noble, and he's only sixty-three."
Well heigh-ho me mateys!
He's only sixty-three!

"My father dear," I gently shrieked, "whatever can you mean
To wed me to an old man? I am only seventeen!
I really can't consent to this; I think it is obscene!"
And so I ran away to sea to be a pirate queen.
Well heigh-ho me mateys!
To be a pirate queen!

The other pirates laughed at me, refusing me quite flat.
They did not want me on their crews, even with a pirate hat!
My dowry bought me a ship; the ship was full of rats.
And so I took upon a crew of twenty-seven cats.
Well heigh-ho me mateys!
Of twenty-seven cats!

The good ship Catnip sailed away into the morning light.
The wind was in our standard: a flag as black as night.
We raised our sails of calico; oh what a pretty sight!
And I stood upon the poop-deck a-clapping with delight!
Well heigh-ho me mateys!
A-clapping with delight!

I really love my furry crew, appreciate their style!
They ate my parrot yesterday, yet still they make me smile.
We're the terror of the high seas, the menace of the isles,
And the dreadful music of our voices can be heard for miles!
Well heigh-ho me mateys!
We can be heard for miles!

For thirty years the kits and cats and I make quite a team!
We sneak on other pirate ships to hear our rivals scream.
We make a waking nightmare of every sailor's dream.
Our hold is filled with jewels, and silk, and fish, and cream.
Well heigh-ho me mateys!
With silk and fish and cream!

So now we are a legend that's known both far and wide.
When the Catnip pulls into a port, both mice and men do hide.
So if you are a kitten, fluff out your tail with pride,
And if you are a woman, don't fear, we're on your side!
Well heigh-ho me mateys!
Don't fear, we're on your side!