To the herald reading this, it needs to be done in your best (?)
music hall German accent.  If you're old enough, or sufficiently
steeped in ancient lore to remember the Katzenjammer Kids - that's
the idea we're going for here.


Mein damen und herren, 
I'm shtandin' und shvearin'
Dat dis is der vill of Der Crown:
Dat's Radagaisus und Ceinwen,
Who sit here und say den
To recognize dis man of renown.

Dough he is Landsknecht,
Und his outfit bedecked,
Mit color choices truly... unique.
It is of La Rochelle,
Vhich he runs rather vell,
und his service of vhich ve vould shpeak.

As Mid-Realm Marshall of Fencing,
A job ve are sensing,
Dat is much like der herding of cats.
On dis tvelfth day of August,
A.S. forty-five, yust
Vait und you'll hear about dat.

Uadahlrich Sassmannshausen,
Soon dere vill be carousin',
For you join mit our pelicans dis day.
Ve do dis at Pennsic Var,
Dough our eyes are qvite sore,
For your outfit turns night into day.

Pray attend us now Uadahlrich,
Yes ve know, 'Rhymes mit Poodle-rick',
Und ve vill tell you of our royal vish
You've served rapier combat,
So by all der plumes on your hat,
Be a Pelican, go forth, und go fish.